Lost in Comfort
by EmberFall
Summary: /NEW:REVISED VER/ Rainkit is what is considered a mistake. Her Parents, Clan, and any cat that looks at her face flinches. She is renamed on her mother's request, and is an outcast from everything she's even known. She finally finds a home and family in a place she never expected, accepts what she is, and love sprouts in the strangest of places at the most ironic of times.
1. Chapter 1

Rainkit was what her mother called a "late bloomer." She did now wail and mewl like the other kits in the nursery. She did not open her eyes when she was supposed to, but rather enjoyed the dull colors of light that played around behind her eyelids.

Though she did not use her eyes, she listened, she felt, she observed everything around her; she just didn't want to open her eyelids. She knew the muscles were there, had twitched them and wrinkled them, and even once tried to see the world. When she tried, though, she would feel as if a mew in her ear would tell her not to, even if her searching never found a body attached it.

Her mother, Skyheart, would often speak to her in the soft light of mornings and the cool heat of night before they slept. Sometimes she sounded peaceful, but sometimes she sounded angry and sad. Skyheart begged her to open her eyes to the world around her, often describing things as if to convince her that the world was worth seeing. She spoke of the tightly woven reeds that granted the nursery its warm shelter—of the soft white sand in the camp and the sparkling water and the pretty rainbow colors a fish's scales would make. Her mother often spoke of Rainkit's father, too. Strongcurrent was the Riverclan Deputy and one of the most strongest, most bravest warriors the clan had. Skyheart said her father was colored like the shadows in the water, and his eyes were the color of an early sunrise.

Sometimes Strongcurrent would come to the nursery and speak soft words of encouragement to his kit, the only surviving one of his mate's litter. Rainkit's sister was dead when she was born—she found this out from the whispered sharing of tongues her parents would have while they thought she was asleep. Strongcurrent's voice would get really scary and her mother's would become very angry.

It was during a conversation like that, held behind the nursery's reeds, when Rainkit opened her eyes for the first time.

* * *

Her body was still warm from where Skyheart had been cradling Rainkit; her warm, milky scent was still heavy in the air, along with Strongcurrent's: her father smelt of reeds and other unfamiliar scents. She could hear their hushed tones on the other side of the woven reeds.

Curiosity had finally gotten the best of her. Rainkit pushed herself to her paws, wobbling a bit in the uneven nesting. She shook out the pricks from her hind legs and snuffled her way to the back of the cramped nursery. Perking her ears towards them, she was able to pick up a bit of their conversation.

"—and Dreamsong said there were no visions or dreams from Starclan about her lack of progress, good or bad." Strongcurrent muttered. "What does this mean? Is she stupid?"

"We can't say that yet," her mother argued, "It's been just over two moons. She can go as slow as she likes, as long as she becomes an apprentice on time."

"Nobody's going to want her as an apprentice! She'll most likely be slower and have bad vision. Not to mention her pelt! Have you ever seen such coloring?"

"You know I haven't; I'm as wary as you about it. Her face…" Her mother made a noise in the back of her throat.

"As long as no other omens come and nothing else goes wrong with her, I can convince Iceheart to be her mentor. He couldn't help the accident with Greenpaw. It's about time he takes on another apprentice."

"I suppose," Skyheart admitted, "..Do you think she's part of a prophecy?"

"Of course not. Cats of prophecy are not crippled; they're strong and competent, not blind."

Her parent's talking went on, though Rainkit stopped listening. She never knew that they thought of her not opening her eyes as something so… bad. She was determined to change their minds. She would be the strongest warrior Riverclan had ever seen! She would make her parents proud. Settling her stance as if she were about to jump, she wrinkled her nose and tried to open them. The same feeling of trepidation that always came was no longer stopping her, and the whisper was ignored as after a couple of heartbeats she found the muscles to open them.

She was greeted with a bright sliver of light, much harsher than the soft shades she was used to. Rainkit tried to keep them open, but had to close them again as she stifled a sneeze. This was ridiculous! Her small body sucked in a big breath as she opened them again, forcing herself to keep them that way. Tears wet the fur on her cheeks as she squinted, but after several heartbeats she was able to sift through the mass amounts of information she was getting.

It was mid-morning, and the sunlight slanted through the roof of the nursery, which was much smaller than she thought. The nests were all lined neatly in the middle, and when she went to lift a paw to clean her cheeks she was stunned. Her fur was speckled with light and dark colors, and Rainkit spent quite a few moments, mesmerized by how her claws appeared and disappeared as she sheathed them. Was this really was she was missing out on? What did the rest of her look like?

Her parents! They would be so relieved, she was sure. Her father would be proud and her mother would nuzzle her and she would be a part of a huge battle and be in a prophecy. She would be a warrior!

First, though, she had to look the part. Her fur was still matted from sleep, and her face needed a good cleaning, which she briskly gave. When Rainkit was finished cleaning, she cleared her throat. She was going to see her parents for the first time! She was practically bursting with excitement.

"Mom, come here!" she squeaked, keeping her posture high.

She heard her mother sigh as she shouldered her way through the nursery. "Rainkit, I was speaking to your father—" Skyheart stopped abruptly. "Oh Starclan."

Before Rainkit could ask, Strongcurrent too pushed his way into the nursery. He seemed to dwarf it.. She thought her mother was big, but he was huge! He took one long moment to assess the situation before looking away. "Your mother and I have to speak to Dreamsong for a moment. We'll be back soon." Without another word, they were gone.

Rainkit was lost. Was this good? Did they just want to make sure her eyes wouldn't be hurt? That was probably it. She was supposed to open them almost a moon ago, after all. Suddenly, the waft of fish came through the small den to her nose. Fish! Strongcurrent said only kits who were strong could eat from the fresh-kill pile.. did that mean she could too, now? Could she leave the den? She had opened her eyes, after all… So, with another deep breath, Rainkid stepped outside.

If Skyheart was right, the blinding thing was the sun, and the sky was blue right now, with little puffy clouds that looked as soft as feathers felt. Suddenly, she was very thankful for her mother's long one-sided conversations with her, back when having eyes closed was normal.

Lower down, back on the ground, there was so much going on! There were cats like Skyheart and Strongsoul, only they were all sorts of different colors, all different sizes… Rainkit wondered what she looked like. Her parents had spoken of her coloring. She knew because of mother that cats of Riverclan could look in the water that they hunted in. Rainkit knew what water smelled like, and she smelt a lot of it out here in the camp.

One tom in particular was heavy with the scent, and after he dropped something floppy into the pile of kill, he settled down to clean himself. He was covered in a glistening sheen of what she hoped to be water. He'd already created a puddle with his white, soaked fur, but she was suddenly struck with a crippling shyness. What if she was too little and silly to be taken seriously?

On second thought, she was the Deputy's daughter. And all she was asking was to look in a puddle! Of course she could do this. Before she could question it any further, she padded up to the wet tom and cleared her throat.

"Um! Excuse me. Can you let me look in the puddle you made? I want to see what I look like."

The tom turned, his paw halfway up to clean his ears. His eyes were bright, like the sky, and they were locked on her with a strange look.

"You… must be Rainkit," He said hesitantly. He brought his paw down and studies another heartbeat. She squirmed under his gaze.

"Feel free to look, kit. I was just about to go see Glowstar."

The puddle was left alone as the tom got up and padded, still slightly damp, towards an outcropping of dark rock. Was everyone in the clan this strange? She hoped not. Well, the puddle was free now, at least. Rainkit padded closer, tipping her head over the edge.

At first, she could see nothing but the sun's reflection. Only after a few furious blinks, did she finally realize why she had been treated so strangely.

Her face was of two different cats. On one side, her fur was a glossy black, a dark eye the same color as the reed stalks. On the other, her face was orange, like the sun, with a blue eye. Right down the middle of her face was a line, from her forehead to beneath her chin. Even her nose was darker to one side. The rest of her body was a mottled patchwork of orange and black, with her paws and tail tipped in white. No other cat she had seen was like her, and even though she had only had sight for a short while, she knew she was alone in her likeliness.

"Rainkit?" mewed a voice. In an instant, she had turned and stood, bowing her head so the cat would not have to see her face. All she could see was long, cream-colored fur coating longer legs, and delicate paws. She slowly looked upwards, and was greeted by a kind-looking face.

"I am Glowstar. Come, little kit. We have much to speak of."

Author's Note: Google 'venus the cat' for Rainkit reference. Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

Glowstar's fur was a pale sand color, so long that it seemed to make her much larger than a normal she-cat. When the sun shone through her pelt, Rainkit could understand why the leader of Riverclan had been said to, well, glow. Even compared to the white tom who she had spoken to moments before, she looked more regal and defined; This cat truly did look like a leader.

Rainkit followed Glowstar towards the edge of the clearing, where her parents waited with another she-cat who Rainkit knew to be Dreamsong, the Riverclan medicine cat. Dreamsong was shorthaired like herself, with a tortoiseshell pelt and wide, grey eyes. Rainkit was not overly fond of her, not that the medicine cat had really done anything wrong, but she had confirmed that Rainkit was not a part of any prophecy from Starclan but a freak of her own accord.

In all actuality, Rainkit was still in a state of shock. The more faces she encountered the more she understood how different she was: a face of two halves, eyes different shades, and a mottled pelt. She looked nothing like the majority of long-furred, light colored cats of Riverclan.

When they got closer, Rainkit could see the discomfort in their eyes. Glowstar settled them in a sort of ring around Rainkit, and she could feel her pelt prickle under their intense looks. Nothing was said for several heartbeats. Finally, Riverclan's leader took a breath.

"Dreamsong, have you spoken to Starclan…?"

The medicine cat looked intently at the dirt between her paws. "Yes, Glowstar."

"And? What did they speak of?"

Silence. Then, "They did not speak of Rainkit, but they did give me a prophecy."

"Rainkit was not involved at all? Not mentioned?"

Rainkit's heart soared. Could she be important after all? She hated the way she was being stared at.

Dreamsong shook her head. "What they have shown me did not involve her at all."

Glowstar gave Rainkit's parents a sideways look, which Strongcurrent responded with a terse nod; Skyheart looked off to an unknown point behind the leader's head.

"Rainkit, your parents have decided to change your name, to correspond with your.. Appearance."

It took Rainkit a moment to process what the she-cat said.

"W-What?" she managed to squeak out, eyes widening.

"They wish to replace your name with Splitkit," came the too-gentle reply.

She could hear the blood rushing through her chest in the silence that settled down between them. Her panic began to make it hard to breathe. A different name? How? Starclan hadn't said anything and they were still changing it to _Splitkit_? What was so wrong with her? Rainkit couldn't speak, and Glowstar took her lack of an answer for one of its own.

"Skyheart has chosen to move back into the Warrior's den with Strongcurrent. I have spoken to them, and.. they believe that the life of a kittypet would be easier on you."

Her paws felt numb. Her stomach felt like it was trying to become smaller, to run away. Still, she found the courage to squeak out a reply.

"Why change my name if I'm becoming a- a kittypet?"

She may have been imagining it in her stress, but Glowstar looked impressed.

"You're not" The leader said slowly, as if trying to convince herself as well, "I am going to present you to the other leaders at the Gathering after you reach six moons. Perhaps one will welcome you into their clan. If none do, then the Two-legs can have you."

Strongcurrent and Skyheart stood with a start upon hearing this.

"Now, that's not what we agreed on—"

Glowstar held Strongcurrent's gaze with a steely one of her own and his jaw closed with an audible click.

"As leader of Riverclan, I have the final say in Rainkit's fate. She was born a clan cat, and she should have the chance to stay that way."

Her father looked like he had some choice words to say, but Glowstar's look did not waver. Gradually he relaxed, masking his anger.

"Fine. She is no kit of mine, regardless of where she goes." Skyheart said nothing, did not even seem to be paying attention. Her mind was elsewhere and her eyes wandered. Rainkit struggled to hold back a sob. What was happening? What would happen to her? Her chest felt tight and her head hurt and her paws shook. With a pitying look, Dreamsong left with her parents, leaving her with Glowstar. She supposed she owed the leader her gratitude, for if not for her Rainkit would be resigned to a life of a kittypet. At least she held a chance, however small it was.

"Thank you," she managed to choke out.

The leader seemed almost startled by her voice of thanks.

"Do not thank me, young one. You have much hardship ahead of you."

* * *

The next five months were monotonous in their complexity and activities. When she had woken up the next day from a fitful rest, she was Splitkit. Glowstar had made the announcement while she hid in the den earlier the day before.

While she hadn't been told to stay in the nursery, it was a necessary action to escape the looks that she received from others. The only times she ventured out was when she was ravenous or to go use the dirtplace. She was the only cat in the Nursery, and when she was not grooming she was with the only cat who accepted her. Mosswing was a blind tom, a frail elder who insisted to the others that he could not judge because he could not see for himself. His black fur was patchy and thin, and Splitkit spent her time picking his ticks and quietly chatting with him. He had a witty, dry sense of sarcasm that she quickly adopted for herself, while she didn't think she could ever carry herself with the confidence he did. She grew to care deeply for the old tom, and would wake most sunrises just to listen to his stories of the other clans and his own journeys when he was younger. While she doubted the truthfulness of some, she still cherished them.

As the day of her six moons approached she became more closed off towards him, and while she knew he noticed, he said nothing. He continued to jabber off about his past, explaining how his first Gathering had been quite the night.

"Yours will be great, I know it," he said excitedly, "The clans have grown much since I was young. The more gossip the better, I say."

Splitkit snorted, rolling her eyes knowing he couldn't see. "Yeah, right. Being denied once sucks, I'd rather not get another three rejections before getting shipped off to the Two-leg beasts."

"Oh, cut yourself some slack. You may not be good for anything, but you can most definitely sass an enemy into submission," the elder teased. Then, after a heartbeat, his face tightened and became serious.

"You have more potential than you think, Splitkit."

As she prepared for the journey to the Gathering a few sunsets later, she wondered if potential would save her.


End file.
